SEX. Yes, let’s.
Let’s face it, it’s not really a taboo subject any more is it? Well, even if it is, let’s anyway.
Have you ever had really amazing sex? Honestly?…the kind that turns you on just thinking about it, the kind you can fantasize over for days, weeks, months, years on end…the kind that leaves you unquestionably satisfied in every way? The kind you thought you knew existed…but realised you really didn’t until that point?
I can only speak for myself here…but I’m talking about the kind of sex that you have with a partner you want in every way (and no…not THAT kind of EVERY way), but emotionally, physically and totally. The kind of sex where both people want nothing more than to make each other feel everything they should and more. Selfish, selfless, hot, passionate, loving, wet, hard, soft, gentle, rough, complete sex.
The kind of sex that leaves you smiling for a very long time and just wanting more and more?…
By now, I imagine many of you are either nodding with a smile on your faces (and have possibly lost a little bit of concentration on what I am writing, due to resurfacing memories) or reading on to find out exactly what in the hell I’m talking about. If you have had this, you know…and if you haven’t… you want to know.
First, let’s not fool ourselves into thinking that sex isn’t a really important part of a relationship or just some physical ‘thing’, because it really is. You may know someone, like them or even love them, but until you have that physical contact, until your lips first touch theirs, your bodies are first against each others…it’s not complete. It can make or break the connection between two people, or in some cases reinforce it.
Some people prefer the term ‘making love’, but let’s face it…it’s not really. It’s a primitive urge, a desire. While it may be emotional, it’s still the place, where you want nothing more than to be entwined with another person’s physical body so closely that you feel you may never come apart, a skin to skin melding where you feel the heat of their body against your own. It is sensual, but it is passionate and raw. Your body reacts in ways you can’t control, to the sight or touch of another body, at the drive of your mind.
If you have had this you know exactly where I’m coming from (no pun intended).
Sometimes, if you are lucky enough to find them, there is just that someone that understands exactly what you want (even when you don’t) and knows how to give it to you. They listen, they watch, they pay attention. They know when to stop something…and when not to. They show you things you didn’t know you liked, until they proved you did…
So, here’s the problem with having amazing sex…(I know most of you at this point are wondering how there could be a down-side to this)… What happens when you can no longer have it?
Sure, there’s sex with other people, but the thought just doesn’t seem to compare. Without sounding like an egotistical woman, I know that if I wanted sex, all I’d have to do is make a call, but I haven’t…don’t want to. Let’s face it, the thought of average or unknown awkward sex with someone is less appealing than expending the energy you have to put into it. I want what I want, and I know exactly what that is. Yes, I said I was a woman that knows what she wants *gasp*.
It may sound shallow to miss something as purely physical as sex with someone, but it’s not really that simple. It’s about the connection you have with that person and the intimacy of it. It’s about knowing how good it CAN be and not wanting to settle for less.
Here we get to the part where you start thinking ‘Well that can’t be the only person who can do it right?’. Maybe you’re right, but it has taken me this long (kind of) to find someone who has it right, that I don’t want to look any further. Someone said to me “Just get out there and have fun, don’t be afraid to ‘use’ a few people’. Not my thing I’m afraid-sorry.
I’ve just found what I want. Everything I want, in who I want, and this is just a part of it. Simple.
So, I guess it just means I stay ‘out of the loop’ for a while *tense sigh*. Trying to put energy into other things just doesn’t cut it, but it will have to suffice…Gym, work, hobbies. After all, the heart wants what the heart wants, and apparently the body does too.