Over the past few months a lot has happened…and not happened. Things I wanted to didn’t, things I didn’t want to, did. It has made me think a lot about priorities-what they are and what they should be.
In a ‘complicated world’, with so many things happening, it has been very enlightening actually coming to a conclusion as to what my priorities are…or should I say ‘who’ they are.
It’s this simple… PEOPLE. People are my priority (including my dogs). Not money, possessions, cars, places or anything else material. Things are just things, they come and go, accumulate and decrease, wear out, get replaced, outdated, updated, lose their value. Things don’t last forever. People are important, and that includes me.
Throughout everything that has happened, or not happened to me, the constant thing was the people in my life. They are the difference in my day being a good day or a bad one, a night being a good one or a great one and the difference in me, having the strength to face the next day. People affect me.
I have had countless coffee dates, visits and epic late night teary phone calls. I have had advice, laughs, drinks and hugs. I have had ears to listen and shoulders to cry on. And at the end of all of these, well needed kicks in the ass and inspiration.
I don’t want to just live to my life, I want to share my life. I want to share the fun, the sadness, the adventure, the experience of everything new and exciting, the relaxation. I want to share it with the people that are important to me, that I love, that love me, that want me to share in theirs. I want that feeling that you get, when something good happens, and there is someone in your life that you just HAVE to tell.
The people who love you do not determine your value, and should never be allowed to. Nobody is perfect, but some people are perfect for each other. The right people will simply make a place for you in their lives and their time.
I don’t care where I go, or what I do. I care about who I am.
I fight for the things I want and love, so at the end of the day, I can say ‘I did my best’. If it’s not good enough, it doesn’t matter, I know I tried everything I could. I don’t want to regret missing the chance at something because I didn’t.
So, when it comes to surrounding myself with the right people, I’m starting with myself. I decided after all of this reflection, that I need to be better. Yes, I’m broken, but life goes goes on, and I can exist it out or live it. Pain is a part of it. Hurt is a part of it. But they are not the only parts. There is so much more, if you can only look past the invisible barriers you set yourself, and see it.
I am doing something about the things I can control…the way I look, the way I feel, the way I want to be. To be myself again.
And I know that while I am looking inward, the people that want to be in my life, the people around me, will be watching over me.
We should all be so lucky.